Remembering Simple Tasks: Let's Go to the Video Tape!

My mom used to be a TV remote control gun slinger. While others used to complain about not being able set the time on their VCR, that it would just flash 12:00, my mom had it down including am, pm, month, day, year, and time zone. She programmed to tape all her favorite shows with delays and extensions and anything else possible. She had an A/B button connected to the back of the TV that you had to flip to get some additional channels that weren’t available on one system or line up. I still don’t get it.

My mom: The TV recording pro

When the Olympic Games were triple cast in 1992, my new husband and I drove to my parent’s house in New Orleans to watch the festivities. My mom and husband brought the small TV from the kitchen and sat it on top of the living room TV. I think there was a third TV involved, so we could see all three telecasts at the same time. There may have been picture-in-picture. It was Olympic fever and sports heaven! Mom had all of the remotes, and she taped in the middle of the night what we couldn’t watch during the day.

Mom used to tape all of her soap operas and then call her mom and discuss what was happening in Port Charles, Pine Valley, or Oakdale. She would stay up late, “catching up on her stories.” She would fill video cassette after cassette.

But then, she forgot everything

Fast forward 28 years, and mom and I have this conversation like its the first time every time.

“Mom. Do you want to watch Perry Mason? Which button do you push to get your LIST of recordings?”

“I don’t know.”

“See that white button? What does it say? ...No, Mom. The writing is white, but the button is black. The white button there says LIST in black letters. That’s what you push to find your list of recordings.”

“OH!”

“Now push the down arrow. Yes, that one. Push it. There is only only one down arrow, Mom. Good job.”

How to help my mom remember

Mom’s speech therapist suggested that she write down the instructions step by step. We did that. I drew a diagram. I circled arrows and buttons. That was a few days ago. I think it’s starting to come together. I’m not sure. We may be at the stage where she will watch whatever is on. I think she knows the channels and how to change them. It happens to her by surprise all the time.

Why do I try to “teach” her? I'm not ready to take over and do everything, although a lot of times it is temptingly easier to just do it yourself.

I also don't want to take on more than I have to. I want to challenge her, but not frustrate her. I don’t want her sitting there wanting to watch Perry Mason and not being able to.

Maybe this time she will remember. She loves Perry Mason.