Alzheimer's Disease Brings Uncertainty
There are so many things, memories, health questions, financial questions, that are affected by Alzheimer's disease. The timetable for the progression of the disease is a huge question mark. You may question how you will handle financial decisions and life decisions that you used to share with your loved one.
Alzheimer's disease and it's uncertainty
What has surprised me is the uncertainty in my mother. She is unsure of so many things. She has always feared reproach. Not in large ways, but in it shows itself in her ever-present need to mitigate her answers.
If you ask if the dishes in the dishwasher are clean, she will reply, "They're supposed to be." No one comes back at her if there is a little food left on a fork or plate.
Struggles to say yes
It's hard for mom to give straight answers. If you ask if she wants fries with her burger, she will reply, "That would be good." Do you want ice cream? "If you want some." She can't seem to just say yes! Maybe it's a Southern thing. Why give a short answer when a long one will suffice!
Now, her questions are about simple things. "Can I use this to wash my cup? Will it be clean?" She wanted to know if she could use the scrubber or the sponge on the sink. I suggested she use some dish soap, too. "Shall I rinse it over here?" There is a clean side and a dirty side of the sink.
When mom empties the dishwasher
It's mom's chore to empty the dishwasher. She wants to be helpful. "Where do these go?"
"Is it ok to put these here?" We are staying in a rental home while we wait for our house to close, so things aren't quite where or what they used to be. Mom wants to do it right.
When I tell mom to look out the window to the left. She looks at her hands to consider which would be the left or the right. She gets them mixed up sometimes. The other right, mom!
My own uncertainties
Mom is doing pretty well. She is happy. She doesn't remember how to make meals much, but the family helps with that. She doesn't miss it!
She has a lot of questions. She is uncertain which shoes to wear. Will she be too hot? She hates to be hot. She needs guidance and affirmation. She's doing fine!
I have my own uncertainties. This disease brings up many.
Alzheimer's and family support
It's my mother's uncertainties that I am often unprepared for and that arrest. We all try to encourage her and reassure her. She's doing great! Even if the Tupperware ends up in some random drawer, we will find it eventually. Fries are always a good choice unless there are good onion rings, and it's always time for ice cream.
It's never a mistake! How do you deal with the uncertainties of Alzheimer's disease? Tell us about your experience in the comments below, or share your story with the community.
Does humor help you cope?