The Challenge of Turning on the Shower
Last updated: April 2023
I am a goodman for my wife with Alzheimer’s. She had been reducing her bathing for over a month or so. Able to bathe herself, I would bring her in, show her the towel, soap, shampoo, and make sure she had her change of clothes.
We tried, but the shower remained dry
Over time, she would just say “I took a sponge bath” or other excuses. I expected the reduced bathing because of sites like this one, so I just kept trying. I would check the shower after her bath and everything was dry, soap was dry, towel was dry.
I started standing outside the bathroom to listen if the water was running or not. I would yell “make sure you wash your hair, we have plenty of time, take a good, long shower.” Nothing worked.
Turning the water on
After no real bath for a few days, I went into the bathroom with her, again showing her everything she needed, and told her to take a complete shower. I said, “stand under the water as long as you want to”.
She stood there next to me with both hands stretched out toward the toilet and said, “so the water is just supposed to come out? Where does it come out?”
She had no idea how to make the water come out or even where the water comes out for a shower. I learned. I just turn the shower on and left and she did great. I had a clean wife again.
Note from the author: A ‘goodman’ is the husband or male head of the household, ranking below a gentleman, a yeoman. Kind of a humble leader. Someone that takes the role of caretaker for his bride with duty and honor.
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