My dad can’t remember his past life……rambling on.
My father is 94 and has dementia. He is in an assisted-living program now and seems to really like it. We had to move him from his home of about 30 years to try to make him safer.. sadly we are still having to pay two extra girls to stay with him during the day and weekend because he cannot remember how to operate his TV or his cell phone and the facility where he is has limited people available as is the case with most places anymore that requires specialized care or services.
I want to mention one of the things that amaze me the most about my father in this setting and that is, he cannot remember where he used to live it seems because he never mentions his home from a year ago. In fact, he often mentions where he lived 50 years ago more often and asked me if we still own that property and house. I Tell him no and it surprises him very much. My daddy was a very hands on person for his whole life and often double and triple checked everything going on in his life every day now he just sits and watches gunsmoke. He can’t do anything as far as paperwork, and he can barely sign his name.. . he never asked any specific questions anymore about his vehicles or his past life. in fact, he can’t remember anything about details in his past life. I often avoid subjects that might lead him off in directions that will worry him or make him question anything.. He is now living in a nice three bedroom apartment and I make sure he has all the snacks cookies, cakes, milk, and lunch meat to make sandwiches anytime of the day he wants them and he don’t have to go upfront to the dining area unless he wants to. The girls have to help him walk because he is so feeble. he is too proud to use a walker or a cane I have provided for him. He often says he don’t want to be like those other old people in the facility. Because he don’t think he is that old. I think my point in this post is I am becoming more and more shocked every day at what few things if any, he can remember about his past, which was only one year ago when he controlled most of his life or at least he tried.
I took over taking care for him and providing him with 24 seven care about three or four years ago. It makes me feel sick to my stomach when I think what is in the future.
Isn’t it amazing he’s forgotten all about his life one year ago?
Hi
, it is a cruel disease, and sometimes it moves fast, but other times it seems to move in fits and starts. Sometimes I think it's the nervous system fighting back with its amazing neuroplasticity until the body shuts down its opportunities.
Short-term memory is generally affected first, so it makes sense that his newest memories are the ones he is losing. It sounds like you are taking good care of him and letting him decide how and where to spend his time. And it's great that he is still able to take care of most of his daily needs (with a little help).
The image he has of himself is from a different time, so it also makes sense that he doesn't see himself as old. And if he shares age-related concerns, aches/pains, you can always put it to weather, or over-exertion to keep him from thinking about it too much.
We're glad you're here, Robbie! I hope you're feeling at home. - Warmly, Donna, (AlzheimersDisease.net Team Member), thx so much, every little bit of discussion helps….like a release valve😊💙 Hi
, we're always here anytime you need to let go of a little steam 🤗- Warmly, Donna (Alzheimersdisease.net Team Member)
I just read your post and wanted to reach out and check in to see how you are doing?
Thank you so much for reaching out and sharing about your dad. Both of my parents had the Alzheimers Disease diagnosis. This disease is rough for the person living with the disease and their family.
I too, at one point was sole caretaker for my mom. It just got to a point that I could not keep up with her needs. It sounds like you have your dad in a great place and he gets the care he needs.
I have included an article that might be helpful to you. https://alzheimersdisease.net/clinical/my-loved-ones-experience-the-as. Please continue to keep us posted on how you and your dad are doing.
Just Keep Swimming...Lynn Marie, "AlzheimersDisease.net Team Member"thx for kind words. All is ok except my father has reached the point where he don’t know where he is. He thinks he is in a motel one day then his old military barracks the next. He could not dress himself last shower so our caregiver helped him. The facility is very good but short on help which is usual for most places these days. It’s extremely costly. Thx for checking 😊💙❤️ 
I am glad that you found a good facility for him. We are at nearly the same point with my loved one. Thank you for the update. Scott Team Member
