Unfair treatment at work
Hi, never posted before but I am in need of advice/opinions welcome.
I feel I am treated very differently at work. Where my colleagues have kids or are pregnant it's fine for them to drop everything and leave and face no repercussions. My mum 70f has dementia. Our battle has been going for well over a year. She is thankfully now in a lovely care home. Before this I was in and out of hospital with her, she had carers in and they'd be ringing me a lot since she wouldn't take her meds or had gone missing.
It's taken a toll on my mental health and I feel I am constantly grieving her. I felt like I was forced to take time off unpaid, as I have worked for my company for so long I can take a career break. Which for most People would be to do something nice I Guess like travelling.
Sorry if this isn't appropriate here but I just feel so annoyed at how my work has handled this. They told me when I returned if my attendance didn't improve I'd be dismissed. I've worked for them over 10 years. I just get annoyed that if I had time off for being pregnant no one would bat an eyelid. Not to mention its mostly people's choice to get pregnant. I didn't choose for my mum to get sick. As well as the cost of her care home, clearing her house to sell, its been hard.
Does anyone else have this experience of being I guess forgotten about in comparison to their colleagues with kids? I'm not having a go at people with kids but I just don't think it's fair at all to be treated this way.
Sorry for my rant and would be very glad to hear anyone's comments 💖
It doesn't sound like they understand what it is to care for someone with Alzheimer's. They should be helpful to you as a good neighbor. We have to share our compassion and love with people so they can last a long time caring for someone like me.
Developing a compassionate community is so very important. Scott Team member
Thank you for sharing this. I think generally caring for family members is treated differently than maternity leave. I think it is one thing that I would like to see changed. Caring for parents and caring for children should both be valued and there should be accommodations for both. What do others feel? Scott Team Member
Thanks for the replies. I thought I was going crazy feeling this way. After all my parents have looked after me all their life so I obviously want to do the same for them when I can. I wish workplaces understood this more and can see the reality of how hard it is caring for someone with dementia.
You are not alone in your feelings. Part of why I moderate and contribute on this site is to be a part of the process of educating people about how this affects everyone involved. It is all encompassing. Scott Team Member
You are not alone in this. I've worked for similar companies. It is okay to be caring for a child, pregnancy etc but when it comes to caring for a spouse, parent or yourself they decide your attendance is suddenly an issue. My last job my boss left every 10 minutes for her sister without repercussions and I was forced out because I had to take care of my husband while working remotely.
I'm so sorry to hear that. It's so frustrating. I wish there was some kind of legislation that protected people like us who are having to look after family members whilst working. It just doesn't seem fair. Unfortunately I can't do my job remotely so that is even more awful to hear that you were forced out whilst still be able to work.
